Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
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