Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
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