I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
