Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
