what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
