OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
