you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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