how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
