So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
