Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
