Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize