Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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