i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
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I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
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our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I got inside last night via doggy door
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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