What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
