I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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