That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
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