do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize