I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
