I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize