remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
