His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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