i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
