His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
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