Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
