Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you

(386): View more from Florida

girlfriend?

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(513): View more from Ohio

well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore

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(407): View more from Florida

Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(720): View more from Colorado

Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.

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(409): View more from Texas

i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.

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(440): View more from Ohio

That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married

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(864): View more from South Carolina

Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?

(803): View more from South Carolina

Yeah, why?

(864): View more from South Carolina

The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries

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