I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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