i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
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