Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
