I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
