Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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