What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
