His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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