There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, sorry about rent.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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