he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
