Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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