Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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