I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize