I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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