I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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