so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
