He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
