I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Randomize
