I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
