Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize