Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
