No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
