That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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