I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize