ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
