Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize