I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Just high enough for therapy.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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